White Stripes fans, you gotta love this. Jack White’s “other band,” the Raconteurs announced today that they are done with their new album…and that it’s coming out in all formats in 1 week:

In order to release an album that will ‘not be defined by it’s [sic] first weeks [sic] sales, pre-release promotion, or by someone defining it FOR YOU before you get to hear it,’ the Raconteurs have opted to release their just-completed album next week. In a press release signed by the band…the Raconteurs say that their second album, Consolers of the Lonely, will be available in digital, CD, and vinyl formats March 25, after being completed earlier this month. It’s an unprecedented move for a band releasing an album via a major label, in this case, Warner Brothers.

Right on, bros. I’m sold. This buy is a shoo-in given that one of the Trumpet staff’s finest moments included the Raconteurs at Lollapalooza 2006 (where they were one of 832 bands who played Gnarls Barkley’s “Crazy”…but at least they did it best…other than Skee-Lo of course) where they blew the roof off Grant Park. If I had a Youtube vid of Pumpkin + the butt-grabbers during the Kanye show…and Armando’s hair.

Anyway, Jack White is now officially a Trumpet mancrush in my book. This is a great stunt. Review in 1 week.

This speaks for itself. The Rockets have won 22 straight games…second-longest win streak in NBA history. They’ve done it in spite of the fact that they lost their all-star center Yao Ming aka “Ki-wi-check” for the season a couple weeks ago. At the time, the injury appeared devastating. Since that date, the Rockets have 11 in a row. Like it or not, they are a contender and they appear to be having fun.

I’ll reiterate…WATCH THE NBA PLAYOFFS THIS YEAR! It will be the best 2.5 months of hoops you’ve seen in years.

http://youtube.com/watch?v=F3MA9m9_FJQ

Ok, this thing is pretty fuckin’ awesome, except for the model airplane noise that would get this thing blasted out of the woods by an RPG during combat. You know that the government has a huge boner for robots, and I’m sure they’re getting all fired up about this one.

In the video, you’ll see that the Big Dog slips on the ice and recovers. That’s my fav part. The motion of the legs is pretty astounding.

-MC Spanky McGee

Heather Mills, the estranged wife of Paul McCartney, was granted nearly 25 million pounds ($50 million) in her divorce proceedings with the former Beatle, she said Monday.

Heather Mills, the estranged wife of Paul McCartney, was granted nearly 25 million pounds ($50 million) in her divorce proceedings with the former Beatle, she said Monday.

Judge Hugh Bennett awarded Mills, who represented herself, 23.7 million pounds ($47.4 million). She said McCartney had proposed 15.8 million pounds ($31.6 million).

Sure–she represented herself. That’s pretty sweet. I’ll give her that. But how exactly do you deserve $50 mil from Paul?

Sure, she’s been a model, done some porn, done some charity work, argued that people should become vegans. Wikipedia on Mills Some of that stuff is kinda commendable, I suppose. (Especially the porn.) Why in the hell does she deserve that much?

Damn, Paul, it’s called a pre-nup. You snooze, you lose.

-MC Spanky McGee

After shoving his gullet full of fast food in Super Size Me, Morgan Spurlock is back with his latest comedic documentary, Where in the World is Osama Bin Laden?

Now, despite (apparently false) rumours that Spurlock actually found OBL, the film does look interesting and could raise some important questions about what the U.S. and other countries are actually doing to look for this guy. In fact, when was the last time you heard any of the presidential candidates talk about how they plan to find OBL, and what they intend to do with him? I remember something from a couple of months back, but these days when you do a Google search on “presidential candidates osama bin laden,” the majority of sites that pop up are about gaffs and slip-ups, in which some news network, presidential candidate, or other dumbass has mixed up ‘Osama’ with ‘Obama.’ While I don’t think, the bin Laden issue is the issue to run on, it is supposed to be one of the U.S.’s top priorities, and Griff for one ain’t heard Scheiß about it recently.

Of course, the real question is whether or not Rockapella will do the theme song…