So, I was laying in bed being a totally wasted piece of shit when I came across another thing that I hate.

Yes, it’s the Kardashians. I FUCKING HATE THE KARDASHIANS!!! When in the fuck did being totally shitty, spitefully shallow, completely morally devoid wealth-mongers become a sufficient reason to be broadcast worldwide to thus become role models for the next generation? It’s bad enough that they are the object of another reality show (and I’ll spare you my rant about the evils of reality TV and the insidious hold that it has over our nation), but do they have to be six of the most uninteresting people that have ever lived in human history? If you are going to create a show that follows people around watching them make peanut butter and jelly sandwiches, at least pick someone that has some serious mental illness or emotional problems. Stick with the Flava Flavs and the Ozbournes of the world because they at least go ape shit every show and give us something to talk about the next day.

These Kardashians are like watching retarded hippos try to mate: THEY DON’T DO ANYTHING! Of the few shows that I have been able to hate my through, there only seems to be three things that this family does: pretend to be human, buy shit, and bitch about the shit they bought. ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME?!?! You have a bigillion dollars and the best things you can come up with are opening a clothing store and buying cars? FUCK!!! If I had that kind of money and a reality show I would be out there shooting chickens out of cannons and buying hookers every other night. For fuck sake, do something cool! I mean if the porn-star daughter and the fat one would get in a fist fight every episode I might actually watch once in a while.

I mean reality TV is meant to bring out the depraved and horrid behavior of those involved. These peoples’ inability to muster even decent conversation is a true testament to how meaningless and empty their lives must be. And these are the people that we have chosen as our delegates should some advanced alien race pick up our television transmission in space. Jesus!!! They blow up the entire planet just for that shit. Hopefully one of them will get cancer soon and we can have something interesting to watch on that God-forsaken show. If were lucky they will go on a family vacation on some sort of boat and the boat will sink in heavily shark infested waters. Until, then I will continue to hate every last one of them. Thank you.

-YoMama