About MC_Spanky_ McGee

Spanky really likes Wendy's #6, and does not buy the so-called purist's prohibition against adding onions or pepperjack to Spicy Chicken. Spanks also rocks out El Burrito Loco in DeKalb, IL. Winners: Arby's, Taco Bell, and Burger King. Losers: Taco John's and people who don't cuss. Slappy is a firm believer in evolution, loves his iPod, and does not like the Republican Party. Slappy also likes double-bass-driven metal (Tool, Lamb of God, etc), funk, classic rock, but also likes classical and pop music.

Cheney can have a cup of STFU

CNN has this headline today: Cheney slams Obama

Cheney made his remarks during a speech at the American Enterprise Institute, a conservative think tank.

He said the use of controversial “enhanced interrogation techniques” was a success that saved thousands of lives. “

First, the old geezer isn’t running for re-election. So, it isn’t clear why he’s still pressing the scare tactics. He must actually believe in what he’s saying. But that doesn’t mean he’s right.

At the same time, Cheney argued that Obama’s decision to release Bush-era interrogation memos was a reckless and unfair distraction in the fight against terrorists.

He noted that Obama’s CIA director, Leon Panetta, opposed the release of the documents. “

Second, where’s the evidence that Bushco saved “thousands of lives” with these techniques? Oh, but wait. He doesn’t want to cough up the evidence.

He just wants to pop off some unsupported bullshit.

Imagine that. Business as usual.

-MC Spanky McGee

Kid takes airbag to crotch

Ballsy Kid Agrees to Airbag Explosion Under Nuts
This video accomplished two positive things: 1) It made me laugh and 2) it ensured this kid will not be reproducing ever.

That airbag is moving. Fast. Look, it’s one thing to be a jackass, and another thing to put your nuts on the line. I suspect this kid had prior brain damage.

Back in black

First of all, I’d like to say that Bro Taguchi still has a bigass head.

Griff thinks she’s too cool for the USA and is leaving. She must be a conservative.

Grown Pumpkin needs to get his battle rifle back out, because I see gobs of Halo 3, again, in our future.

And I’m about to start bitching about all sorts of shit. Again.

The Soupy Trumpet is back for a third incarnation. Could get ugly.

-MC Spanky McGee

Snakesssssss!

CNN reports that a snake-handling preacher has been arrested:

The pastor of a Kentucky church that handles snakes in religious rites was among 10 people arrested by wildlife officers in a crackdown on the venomous snake trade.

More than 100 snakes, many of them deadly, were confiscated in the undercover sting after Thursday’s arrests, said Col. Bob Milligan, director of law enforcement for Kentucky Fish and Wildlife.

Most were taken from the Middlesboro home of Gregory James Coots, including 42 copperheads, 11 timber rattlesnakes, three cottonmouth water moccasins, a western diamondback rattlesnake, two cobras and a puff adder.

Handling snakes is practiced in a handful of fundamentalist churches across Appalachia, based on the interpretation of Bible verses saying true believers can take up serpents without being harmed.

I feel a strong urge to recommend that all Christian nutjobs should go pick up some puff adders, but I will resist that urge.

Let’s think a little bit here. Aren’t there other ways to tell whether someone really believes in Baby Jesus?

Surely there are. I doubt the snake handling is the only litmus test.

And what is it with Christians and snakes anyway? That’s just so Ozzy of them.

-MC Spanky McGee


MC Spanky McGee is trying to get back in the saddle here at the Trumpet.

Huckabee in a prom dress?

Huckabee: Demonizing Obama is a ‘fatal mistake’

Huckabee suggested questions about whether he might join McCain on the ticket were premature. “You can’t accept an invitation to the prom until the football captain asks you. So I’m not going to go out and buy the outfit just yet,” said Huckabee, according to AFP. “

Weird. Just weird. With all of our connotations about prom and the football captain, I’ll tell you what this sounds like to me. McCain is the football captain and Huckabee is the little sophomore girl in a dress.

What happens at the post-prom party?

BOO.

-MC Spanky McGee

New Metallica album named “Death Magnetic”

Metallica names new album

What? Have they gone indie-rock? What kind of title is that?

The only good news that I gleaned from the article is this:

“Death Magnetic” (Warner Bros.) was produced by Rick Rubin

If anyone can save Metallica from themselves, it’s Rick Rubin. You sure as shit know that Bob Rock can’t do it, since he is heavily responsible for the murder of Lars Ulrich and the subsequent replacement of him with a rather-inferior lookalike drummer. At any rate, Bob Rock produced “St. Anger,” and we know what a hot pile of shit that that was.

I hope Newsted is wearing aviators somewhere, lounging around in an “And Justice For All” t-shirt, shaking his head–BUT luxuriating in the truth that he wisely quit that band….

-MC Spanky McGee

Soupy Trumpet Blasts from the Web 6-17-2008

NEWS

Newly found planets make case for ‘crowded universe’

Lifehacker.com

How to Make Windows Vista Less Annoying

Power User’s Guide to Firefox 3

instructables.com

How to rescue a stinky T-shirt (Coping with str…

sogoodblog.com

Cindy McCain Caught Plagiarizing Recipes AGAIN

gizmodo.com

Dealzmodo: Amazon MP3 Albums For $1.99 (Starting With Coldplay)

Save the Earth. Use birth control.

Here’s a thought. If you really want to curb energy use and to prevent the atmosphere from taking in more greenhouse gases, why not forgo having children? Think of all the energy you have consumed in a lifetime. Then multiply that for each child you would have…. Yep. That’s tons and tons of energy.

There’s no need to multiply. Forget all these hybrids, just use birth control!

Bonus: the fewer workers we have around, the more demand there will be, and the higher our wages will be! Ahhhh, we all win.

“But Spanky, I want my own rugrat!”

ADOPT.

-MC Spanky McGee

Imagine that. Kanye acts like a jackass again.

Bonnaroo crowd tells Kanye West he sucks

West had been scheduled to take the main stage at the Bonnaroo Music & Arts Festival at 2:45 a.m. Sunday morning. While the sleepy thousands in the audience waited, a message on the jumbotrons told them West’s show would be delayed until 3:15 a.m., and when that didn’t happen, that he would start at 3:30. West didn’t hit the stage until 4:25 a.m “

Kanye’s head is so big that he jumped up in the air and got stuck.

Whether he’s telling lies at Lollapalooza or being late at Bonnaroo, Kanye West has demonstrated that he thinks that he is a god.

Newsflash, Kanye. The crowd isn’t buying it anymore. Frankly, I think this asshole should be sent into obscurity, and his albums should never be bought again.

Kanye doesn’t have one-tenth of the musical ability of Adam Jones.

Act like a professional. The only way to cure these “fevered egos” (thank you, Bill Hicks), is to kick them to the curb. But, of course, what army I am leading? None….

-MC Spanky McGee