Jon Lovitz: At least he didn’t use the N-word

Here is a short “report” on Jon Lovitz’s saying shit that he shouldn’t be saying:

Jon Lovitz Tells a Joke

“Jeremiah Wright said that aids was invented by the government to kill black people… [pause] …government, they aren’t doing a very good job…[pause]… I mean because it’s spread to everybody.”

Before Lovitz tries to clarify what he means, the initial impression is that Lovitz appears to be saying that if the government invented aids to kill black people, the government is not doing a good job because the size of the “remaining” black population. And if that was what Lovitz was saying, then it would be natural to think he might be implying that the government needs to do a better job.

However, given his “I mean because it’s spread to everybody” it seems he intends the “joke” to be a jab at Wright’s claim that the government invented aids to kill blacks, since it would be pretty stupid of the government to think that such a “weapon” would be very accurate and remain in the black population. (Perhaps Lovitz is giving the government too much credit)

Anyway, I don’t take Lovitz to be making a racist joke, much less a “very racist joke,” but just saying shit he shouldn’t be saying, given how easy it is to misinterpret it.

Pizza Hut is Awsome Graffiti (at the Yacht Club)

Pizza Hut is Awsome Graffiti

Apparently in Iowa City somebody felt the need to graffiti up a brick wall in a bar with the words “Pizza Hut is Awsome” in Sharpie. I love the enthusiasm, of course the Sharpie / jank handwriting, and the fact that “awesome” is misspelled only adds to the value.

This was sent to me via (what the kids are calling) text messaging from Spanky and Griff. I love it.

Also I do love Pizza Hut for their jackpot wings, best-in-the-business thin crust sausage, and the fact that they serve Mt. Dew from the fountain. That being said, they are the most ridiculously overpriced mainstream pizza chain in the business. Can we get a little moderation please?

Spanky would like to add that this is written on one of the humongous brick pillars at the Yacht Club, which is discussed in:….

Soupy Trumpet Blasts from the Web 4-25-08 part 2

Spanky beat me to the punch, so here is a second edition… oops

Here’s another Soupy Trumpet daily-dose of internet finds to enjoy:

Spanky would like to add this video on DoubleViking:
“Something is goin’ on, can I smell yo’ dick?”

Arby’s Buys Wendy’s

Arby\'s Buys Wendy\'s

Wendy’s, the third most popular burger chain behind McDonald’s and Burger King, was bought by the shaved roast beef chain Arby’s today for $2.34 billion. The family of Dave Thomas, founder of Wendy’s, is not happy about the deal.

“It’s a very sad day for Wendy’s, and our family. We just didn’t think this would be the outcome.”

That is what one daughter had to say about it and “Wendy” herself is said to be taking it very hard as well.  I am cautiously rejoicing for the simple fact that Wendy’s picked up and left town (2 locations) without really letting me anybody know not too long ago.  I am hoping that since there are too many three Arby’s locations here, maybe we will see a Wendy’s brought back.  I will continue to rock the Dane Cook BK Lounge and Mc’D's until the Spicy Chicken makes its way back into my life.

Also note to Spanky… If you ever wanted to start a fast food restaurant, now is the time to strike.  Triarc is apparently buying up all the fast food joints that end in “y’s” so if you could  get “Spanky’s” ready, maybe you could cash in too?

Backup New York Giants Tight End Kevin Boss Godly Wikipedia

Kevin Boss Strange Wikipedia Entry

The New York Giants won the NFL Super Bowl back in February over the 18-1 not 19-0TM New England Patriots. Many have attributed some of the success to the fact that disruptive pro bowl tight end Jeremy Shockey got hurt and was unable to play. Rumors have since circulated that Shockey will be traded, released, or somehow not with the team next year and the move is likely to come during the first day of the NFL Draft.

Shockey’s replacement Kevin Boss is the only one that does not believe that.

“He’ll be back,” Boss said, per Vacchiano. “I’ve got a lot more to learn from him. He’s been a great mentor. Obviously he’s a better player than me. He can do some things I can’t yet.”

Doing a little research on the modest not as good Boss shows he is right about Shockey being the superior douchebag and football player regardless of whether he is right about him being back in blue next season or not. Research lead to the Kevin Boss Wikipedia entry that seemed simple enough except for one strange line (maybe I am missing something somewhere???):

Kevin Boss has also been referred to by many as God in the second coming.

WTF does that mean? Is that a prank? Is that a rightfully mad Giants fan that sees that Boss is not THAT good that you can throw away a talent like Shockey? Or is that Shockey himself editing that entry, after all he is disgruntled by the perception that the Giants got better when he was off the field.

Anyone have any insight on this or the Patriots trying to trade mark “19-0″ (link above) when they finished 18-1? Don’t Stop Believing

The Other Guy in Bon Jovi, Richie Sambora Drives Drunk – Gets DUI

Bon Jovi\'s Richie Sambora Mugshot

Richie Sambora, guitarist of Bon Jovi, was charged in Laguna Beach (California) today for driving his Hummer drunk with kids in the vehicle back in March.  Sambora received two DUI related misdemeanor charges for weaving across lanes and blowing a .13 bac.

Dude is rich and a woman was in the car (sober enough to be allowed to take the children with her)… point is “Hey dingle dick, let somebody else drive“.  He was lucky to avoid child endangerment charges.

He had been in rehab twice in 2007.  I hope that he gets it together, lets somebody else drive when he is blitzed, or is on the road alone when he learns the ultimate lesson.

Where’s Terrell Owens? Porn Shoot with the Bang Bros Maybe?

Is that Terrell Owens in the background of a Bang Bros porn shoot?

Several blogs are speculating that Dallas Cowboy football superstar Terrell Owens is seen in the background of a photo (above) at a hardcore porn photo shoot by the Bang Bros. This reminds me of Where’s Waldo (also above) and only really gets mentioned because IF this is TO, then him cheesing in the background is pretty funny. I can’t imagine NFL commissioner Roger Goodell would be too happy.

In terms of this being some “dirty” sex scandal or something, this photo does not hold any weight. Apparently TO, or this guy, is not seen in any of the other pictures and the Bang Bros crew did not respond when asked by reporters whether Terrell Owens had a cameo in one of their pieces. Is it possible he was just walking by? This photo almost looks like the dude and the alleged TO are sharing a “I can’t believe a pro football player is coincidently walking up on a dude about to get some dome” moment.

TO continually gets press for his body, but he would really have to do more than this picture to top Dennis Rodman‘s sexcapade photos.

Who are the Bang Bros (NSFW) anyway? They didn’t ever have a bus (NSFW) did they?

el oh el

You Got Rick Rolled – Great Minds Think Alike

Rick Roll at Wikipedia

The Rick Rolling (definition of Rick Roll) phenomenon is no surprise to the Soupy Trumpet crew. In fact Rick Astley’s “Never Gonna Give You Up” is one of our favorite songs that we jam out to on the regular. One thing that I like to do when playing Halo 3 with Spanky and random douchebags is to play the song through the headset, breathe heavy and tell them I am “just getting some reps in”. The responses generally range from confusion, annoyance, and mostly homosexual slander. For my part that cracks me up, although I am provoking it. Even more funny to me is finding other jams to rotate in like “She Drives Me Crazy” by the Fine Young Cannibals or the Brian Adams Robin Hood song.  Tay Zonday (aka Chocolate Rain guy) has a tight version of Astley’s jam too.

Check out You Got Rick Rolled for more on the internet craze or for a browser shaking – impossible to close – experience check out Rick Rolling and hate me when you are done.


Hillary: Nah, bro…we’re cool.

Somehow indicating that she has a pulse on how the gaffes of her own campaign will be interpreted by voters, Hillary Clinton says the controversy and resignation of Mark Penn won’t hurt her campaign. This is so amusing. When I was about 8 years old, we would play a game in my neighborhood that we just called “Guns.” We all had toy guns (I actually had an M-16 that was one of the “it” weapons in the hood). It was basically hide and seek, but to “catch” somebody you had to “shoot” them from relatively point blank range before they “shot” you. The game ALWAYS devolved into an argument when one player would ambush another from the bushes with a subsequent dispute over whether the shot was successful.

Kid 1: “Blat…blllllllat! I shot you.” (noises were obligatory)

Kid 2: “No you didn’t.” (running away)

Argument ensued. I’m sure you get it. Hillary is now playing the role of Kid 2. “You didn’t hit me…see?”

I don’t usually care about what the comments to a particular article say, but it looks like everyone on is tired of Hill’s spin cycle. EVERY SINGLE comment says something to her credibility. With her dwindling lead in the Pennsylvania polls, it looks like her act is played…sooooooo played.

I won’t call for it now, but pretty soon it will be time for Hill to:

[youtube width="425" height="355"][/youtube]

It may be Pennsylvania (April 22). It may be North Carolina (May 6). IT MAY BE GUAM (May 3)…but it’s coming.