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 We saw the Diplomats of Solid Sound at the Mill last night.  That’s a band you should gather your peeps for every time they’re in town.   And of course the ladies are…uh…entertaining.  I like how the fellas are all business in their suits.  Can’t tell you bout it…gotta go see ‘em.  They draw the ladies to the dance floor…nuff said.  They get 4.5 Taguchis.

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TOOL show–Minneapolis.

Taguchi and I drove up to see TOOL last night in Minneapolis. We ignored the evangelicals standing outside the Target Center singing for the redemption of our oh-so-Satanic souls.

ISIS, who opened, is basically Diet Tool. They have some airy, drony, odd-time songs that mostly put Taguchi to sleep (who was very tired). I don’t think he was bored by them–more than likely, they served as little lullabies for the tuckered-out fella to regroup for Tool. On the whole, ISIS is solid, but they seem to lack some punch somewhere.
Tool rocked, as expected. Maynard seemed to have an off-night, for the reason that he stopped singing in a couple of the early songs. He might have been ill a few nights before. Who knows? But Maynard certainly deserves some liberties. Adam Jones, Justin Chancellor, and Danny Carey held a musical seminar. One of the highlights involved a fast drum solo in the normally-quiet middle of “Schism.” “Forty-six & two” just rocked. DC tore up the drum solo at the end, but what did you expect?

The light show started out slow, and one wondered whether it was going to get going at all. Well, it progressively got going, and by the end, it was awesome. The white stage allowed graphics to paint themselves all over it, which was pretty cool. The laser show was nothing novel on the whole, as Pink Floyd had done all that for years. But novelty is not the issue here, Dude. Everyone was transfixed by the spectacle.

Maynard showed his usual dry sense of humor, taunting that “Kansas was louder” during the band’s onstage break–which prompted Minneapolis to deliver a proper retort. The Taguchinator and I were in agreement that it was one of the loudest crowds of which we had ever been part. They hit their crescendo during “Aenima,” singing their balls off to the whole song, basically.

As usual, Tool didn’t move around much. When your music is that complex, your musicianship alone is enough to rock big time. Maynard danced a little and did some strip-teases, but he sure as hell doesn’t need to run around like this douchebag.

We were on the road forever this weekend. So–TOOL–please come to Iowa. We’ll bring some friends. We promise. Love, Spanky “Not Worthy” McGee.

Re: Lolla

All agreed, except for the fact that Hot Chip should be reclassified as the winner of the “Good but not Good” Award. They were jammin for a minute, then they played Enya. Dunno…British music.

You didn’t miss anything with the Flaming Lips…except when Wayne came out in a bubble.

Other awards:

Best food item: corn on the cobb.

Best getup: Gnarls.

The Band you knew would deliver…and did: Gnarls.

Best hookup: Bret Bassi. How does your hair lay down like that?

Funniest moment (by the largest of margins): Billups and the buttgrabbers (you at your finest, Punkin). I kept telling him not to do it but he was like, “I got this, Bro.” He was right.

Best band I only heard for 3 minutes: Particle.

Finally, the winner of the “Extreme Roller Coaster Ride of the Day” award goes to….well, me. Sunday’s antics were classic, including my best Johnny Depp on the walk to the show (arrr…treasure matey) and my run-in with Big Poppa Pump. Plus, I was rockin-out the “Creed Sucks” t-shirt all day(parlayed into a photo op). In the immortal words of Jesse Hughes, “Let’s hear it for me!”

Lolla Follow-up

I’m betting Pumpkin and Brosiah Taguchi will add on this and maybe even kick me in the jizunk for some of these nuggs, but a post on the 2006 Lollaplaooza is needed.

Here are some awards:

Best surprise: Matisyahu. His band rocks, and that mofo can tear up some beatbox. I could’ve done without the preaching, but I knew what I was in for.
Lipton’s Weak Tea award: Kanye West. (Look, Broba Fett, don’t rip off Gnarls Barkley. You’re supposed to be some original dude–so original, in fact, that you are using strings for the first time in hip hop. WHAT????? Bullcrap.
Domino’s Delivery award: Queens of the Stone Age. Homme came out like he had been playing ZONK for 4 hours, but tore it up. Joey Castillo is a badass, even if he’s laying down Dave Grohl’s stuff in many songs. You knew Queens was gonna rock–and they did.

Just Doin’ Ok award: three-way tie: Common, Dresden Dolls, Hot Chip.

Shiny Happy People award: The Go Team. Jesus. This is the happiest damn band on the planet. Like Blue’s Clues kinda happy. Or maybe Barney on speed.
Spanky realizes that his missing the Flaming Lips was probably a big mistake.

-Spanktronic 2112