http://www.cnn.com/2008/POLITICS/04/24/campaign.wrap/index.html

Clinton claims she leads in the popular vote.

“I’m very proud that as of today, I have received more votes by the people who have voted than anyone else,” Clinton said Wednesday, one day after her decisive win in Pennsylvania.

Not so fast, says Obama’s campaign. Clinton’s count includes her wins in Michigan and Florida, but the Democratic presidential candidates agreed not to campaign in those states because they violated party rules by scheduling their contests too early.

Look, this is just crazy talk. You can’t count those damned votes from Florida and Michigan. She should know this, seeing as she has been whining so much about how they’ve been disenfranchised.

Hillary: if they were disenfranchised, then their votes didn’t count.

You can’t have it both ways, you crazy-ass fool.

Barack Obama needs to hammer her on this point. She is full of shit.

If Obama can’t see that she has made a huge blunder here, he’s an idiot.

-Agent Spanky.

Clinton pokes fun at Bosnia gaffe, Bill

It was a gaffe that caused the Clinton campaign a serious headache two weeks ago, but in an appearance on The Tonight Show with Jay Leno Thursday night, the New York senator was all smiles about it.

As she walked out on stage, Clinton told Leno she almost didn’t make the interview.

“I was pinned down by sniper fire at the Burbank airport,” Clinton said laughing. “

Try to laugh it off, Hillary. Go ahead. I’m not laughing.

“You know this has been such a mismatch of words and actions,” Clinton also told Leno. “I was thinking about it, because obviously I’ve been so privileged to represent our country in, gosh, more than 80 other countries, lots of war zones and all the rest of it — I wrote about this in my book and obviously I just had a lapse.” “

Nice. Hillary’s experience is so vast that it caused her to make shit up. That’s the message. See how full of shit she is? The more I’ve thought about the sniper story, the more I’ve realized what a liar she is. Where did she get the material for that supposed memory? As friends of mine have said, there’s no fuckin’ way that the government would let the first lady fly into a war zone like that. It makes no sense.

No amount of laughing it off or trying to pin it to her little vacations is going to convince me that this was a simple brain fart. It’s not. It’s a goddamned lie that attempted to trick the American people, and it should be called for what it is.

-MC Spanky McGee

DAMMIT…they stole my thunder…

Congressional representatives from Florida rejected the idea of a hybrid primary vote today. Even Taguchi figured that out. I did a little research. For this, we need to look to Oregon. In 1981, the Oregon Legislative Assembly passed a bill allowing vote by mail (VBM) elections. It wasn’t until the scandalous resignation of Republican Senator Bob Packwood that Oregon sprung into action with VBM in 1996. Today in Oregon, a citizen has no option to vote in a booth…it’s all VBM. However, it has been a long and painstaking process. They have conducted at least two studies into their system. One of those studies has revealed that VBM is wildly popular among voters and also serves to increase turnout across almost every demographic.

The other study, chaired by President Jimmy Carter and former Secretary of State James Baker, is of much more significance here. In short (since they stole my damn thunder), it says:

• Hybrid voting systems (where the voter has the option of voting in person or by mail) are problematic because they force voting officials to actually conduct two elections at once. To that end, one county official said, “under the (hybrid) system we weer putting out fires all over the county on election day.” The difficulties of running both kinds of elections simultaneously increased the likelihood of confusion and of mistakes.
• One of the primary VBM security measures in Oregon is the signature verification process, wherein election workers compare the signature on every return identification envelope with the signature scanned from the voter’s registration card.
• Finally, there is concern over the potential for voting fraud and coercion in any system that lacks the fundamental privacy of the voting booth. In many respects, these conclusions remain vali, at least when examined in the context of Oregon’s all-mail balloting system. However, the study cited that Oregon has had a historically clean, open and permeable election system, with no history of machine politics or election fraud. The implication is that while voting by mail has worked well in Oregon, it may not work as well in regions, states or localities with a more contentious political culture.

HERRRR-O-OOOOOOOOO! Remember this?

Sorry, Florida. You get no leeway. If the Bush camp can rig Florida, then I’m fully confident that the Clinton camp can do the same. I realize these are strong allegations, and we’ll never know if they are substantiated…but the allegations are enough to sack your attempt to conduct a makeshift primary using the most difficult-to-manage voting system possible. Whatever you want to call it, Florida 2000 was probably the greatest election fiasco in American history…or at least of our time. Now Florida wants to hold it’s primary on the fly (after making their bed already)? As our buddy The Shire would say, “I f***ing doubt it.”

Ironically, the Carter-Baker study contains this golden nugget:

The Florida Department of Law Enforcement has even referred to absentee ballots as the tool of choice for those inclined to commit voter fraud.

NEXT? (sorry Spanks…I stole your thunder)

Carter-Baker study:

http://www.sos.state.or.us/executive/votebymail/pdf_files/CarterBaker.pdf

Kevorkian to run for office

According to the Oakland Press, Kevorkian is planning to mount an independent bid in Michigan’s 9th District seat currently occupied by Republican Joe Knollenberg.

“We need some honesty and sincerity instead of corrupt government in Washington,” Kevorkian told the paper. He also said his plans are in the “formative stage” and he would make a formal announcement next week.

This is awesome. I hear that Kevorkian has the Grim Reaper’s endorsement, and I hear Eliot Spitzer’s on board, well, ya know, because he’s “ready” for the changes that Kevorkian will, uh, bring about.

-MC Spanky McGee

*simulated image

We at The Trump would like to pass a friendly reminder to those in the various states holding their 2008 presidential primary elections today. We will not tell you who to vote for by sending you to this article and will leave you to choose for yourself whether you are a Democrat or Republican or neither.

This election gives you many to choose from, none of which are named George Bush or Dick Chaney. You won’t get the man that won lost years ago and now makes power point presentations for money, Al Gore. You won’t get John Kerry, Jonathan Edwards, Jesse Jackson, Al Sharpton, or Ross Perot this time around. The mayor Rudi Giuliani and the Governor Bill Richardson are no longer there either. Even Stephen Colbert is out of the race too. Former President Bill Clinton can only become the first husband as he has already served two terms. What’s left is Hillary Clinton and Barack Obama for the Democrats and John McCain, Mike Huckabee, and Mitt Romney for the Republicans…oh and Ron Paul too.

If you cannot decide you can always take the advice of Montgomery Brewster and “Vote None of the Above” or just write in Grown Pumpkin and hope for the best.

Democratic Illinois Senator Barack Obama delivered a speech in New Hampshire at the site of the presidential primary on January 8, 2008 that inspired will.i.am of the rap group Black Eyed Peas to create a song called “Yes We Can”. In a matter of 2 days will.i.am was able to gather up around forty celebrities to help him record the song and shoot the video. It is making rounds on the internet just in time for “Super Tuesday” tomorrow.

Among those that helped will.i.am were Jesse Dylan, Common, Scarlett Johansson, Herbie Hancock, Tatyana Ali, Nick Cannon, Kareem Abdul-Jabbar, John Legend, Kate Walsh, Aisha Tyler, Amber Valletta, Taryn Manning, Nicole Scherzinger, Adam Rodriguez, Alfonso Ribeiro, Austin Nichols, Ed Kowalczyk, Eric Balfour, Esthero, Harold Perrineau, Johnathon Schaech, Kelly Hu, Maya Rubin, and Tracee Ellis Ross.

The New Hampshire concession speech to Hillary Clinton has been getting major press and has been thrown about as the modern brother to the famous “I have a dream” speech by Martin Luther King Jr. In his blog, will.i.am made comparisons of Obama to King, Abraham Lincoln, and John F. Kennedy. Many people share the same sentiments and are pulling for the man running a campaign called “Change” simply on the hope that he offers and not on his politics.

But in the unlikely story that is America, there has never been anything false about hope. For when we have faced down impossible odds; when we’ve been told that we’re not ready, or that we shouldn’t try, or that we can’t, generations of Americans have responded with a simple creed that sums up the spirit of a people.

Yes we can.

The video for “Yes We Can” has been seen already by more than 11 million viewers via YouTube.com and at the official site for the song YesWeCanSong.com.

Additional Reading at MTV.com: http://www.mtv.com/news/articles/1580884/20080204/will_i_am.jhtml