NASA, Apple join KFC in the race for alien business

NASA on Monday will broadcast the Beatles’ song “Across the Universe” across the galaxy to Polaris, the North Star.

The idea came from Martin Lewis, a Los Angeles-based Beatles historian, who then got permission from McCartney, Yoko Ono and the two companies that own the rights to Beatles’ music. One of those companies, Apple, was happy to approve the idea because is ‘always looking for new markets,’ Lewis said. “

Apple is a bit slow here, since this has been in style ever since KFC started selling chicken to aliens. However, I’m sure that aliens will be happy to add crappy Finger Eleven songs to their playlists.

In other news, during a Soupy Trumpet conference call yesterday morning, Grown Pumpkin assured Trumpet shareholders that the company would surely expand its dog crap delivery service to aliens. Bro Taguchi, however, was skeptical that Pumpkin’s dog, Mudbutt, could keep up with demand on Degoba.

-MC Spanky McGee

KFC for aliens!

Kentucky Fried Chicken has lost its damn mind, Reuters reports. They put a giant logo out in the desert by Area 51.
“If there are extraterrestrials in outer space, KFC wants to become their restaurant of choice,” KFC President Gregg Dedrick said in a statement.

(Reuters photo)
Next they’ll put a logo on the moon. I can’t wait until The Alien, E.T., and Jabba the Hutt stop by for a bucket of KFC. This is totally going to rock. I hope they like biscuits and mashed potatoes. They sure as hell wouldn’t order that piece of shit known as “The Snacker.”

The Giger Alien enjoys a leg:

alien kfc

et kfc

jabba kfc 2

Spanky is aware that his Photoshop skills are totally ghetto. Spanky had KFC for lunch today. It was awesome.

-Colonel Spanky