McCartney’s ex-wife gets close to 50 million dollars? Whaaaat?

Heather Mills Money Poster Held By Paul McCartney Photoshop
Heather Mills, the estranged wife of Paul McCartney, was granted nearly 25 million pounds ($50 million) in her divorce proceedings with the former Beatle, she said Monday.

Heather Mills, the estranged wife of Paul McCartney, was granted nearly 25 million pounds ($50 million) in her divorce proceedings with the former Beatle, she said Monday.

Judge Hugh Bennett awarded Mills, who represented herself, 23.7 million pounds ($47.4 million). She said McCartney had proposed 15.8 million pounds ($31.6 million).

Sure–she represented herself. That’s pretty sweet. I’ll give her that. But how exactly do you deserve $50 mil from Paul?

Sure, she’s been a model, done some porn, done some charity work, argued that people should become vegans. Wikipedia on Mills Some of that stuff is kinda commendable, I suppose. (Especially the porn.) Why in the hell does she deserve that much?

Damn, Paul, it’s called a pre-nup. You snooze, you lose.

-MC Spanky McGee

NASA, Apple join KFC in the race for alien business

NASA on Monday will broadcast the Beatles’ song “Across the Universe” across the galaxy to Polaris, the North Star.

The idea came from Martin Lewis, a Los Angeles-based Beatles historian, who then got permission from McCartney, Yoko Ono and the two companies that own the rights to Beatles’ music. One of those companies, Apple, was happy to approve the idea because is ‘always looking for new markets,’ Lewis said. “

Apple is a bit slow here, since this has been in style ever since KFC started selling chicken to aliens. However, I’m sure that aliens will be happy to add crappy Finger Eleven songs to their playlists.

In other news, during a Soupy Trumpet conference call yesterday morning, Grown Pumpkin assured Trumpet shareholders that the company would surely expand its dog crap delivery service to aliens. Bro Taguchi, however, was skeptical that Pumpkin’s dog, Mudbutt, could keep up with demand on Degoba.

-MC Spanky McGee

Michael Jackson’s Thriller Album Turns 25 and Prisoners Dance

Michael Jackson Thriller 25 Photoshop

Yesterday Michael Jackson‘s Thriller, “The World’s Biggest Selling Album Of All Time”, was re-released celebrating the 25th anniversary of the landmark album.  Two versions of the album are available for purchase; standard and deluxe.  Both versions contain the nine original, Quincy Jones produced tracks as well as seven bonus tracks for the 25th Anniversary Edition.  Six of these songs have been released for the first time on this album.

New for this version are songs done by contemporary artists.  Soupy Trumpet favorite helped to make 2008 updated versions of “The Girl is Mine” (originally with Paul McCartney) and P.Y.T. (Pretty Young Thing).  Black Eyed Peas bandmate Fergie collaborated on “Beat It 2008″.  Grammy Awards star Kanye West did a remix of “Billie Jean” for the album and Akon’s version of “Wanna Be Startin’ Somethin’ has been the primary source of buzz for this release.  There is an unreleased track excerpt from the Vincent Price voice-over sessions added and available only at Best Buy there is a “Thriller (def Remix)” exclusive hidden track.  “For All Time” is the only bonus track from the original Thriller sessions that had not been released before.  Also included is a bonus DVD that comes with videos for “Billie Jean”, “Beat It”, “Thriller”, and the live performance of “Billie Jean” at the “Motown 25:Yesterday, Today, and Forever” special.

Thriller is credited for selling 27 million albums in the United States, making it #2 of all time behind the Eagles’ Greatest hits.  Around the world though, Thriller has sold 104 million albums which makes it the biggest selling album in the world to date.

A few months ago (if not longer) another famous Viral Video popped up on YouTube and the internet of 1500 Cebu Provincial Detention and Rehabilitation Center (CPDRC) in Cebu, Philippines rehearsing their Thriller dance routine.  There are very few things more surreal than a large group of prisoners choreographing Thriller while incarcerated (link to video below).

[youtube width="425" height="355"][/youtube]