Yo quiero amiga! Taco Bell dog spanks it.

[youtube width="425" height="355"]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2mq2pxhB7u0[/youtube]

Spanky says:

This little bastard must be lonely since Taco Bell kicked his ass to the the curb. Now he’s got no job, no food, and he’s getting busted on camera polishing his red rocket. Maybe he’ll show up on VH1 soon looking for love or trying to “get fit.”

What a loser!

-MC Spanky McGee

Spanky’s review of Taco Bell’s Fiesta Platter and Wendy’s premium fish sandwich

1. This last weekend I had Taco Bell’s Fiesta Platter. I had the grilled steak stuft burrito version. The burrito is pretty solid–it’s big enough to get you feeling warm and round. The most surprising positive aspect of this platter is the salsa, which is chunky. I didn’t know Taco Bell could get chunky, since most of their sauces are runny. The only problem was that they didn’t give me enough of it. I don’t like naked tortilla chips. I guess I could have asked the manager for more salsa.

The rice is fairly standard. The beans are topped off with that weird Taco Bell sauce that they put on the enchirito (one of my favorite under-the-radar items at ol’ TB).

Beyond that, the Fiesta Platter is just a new arrangement of old materials. But I’m on to you, Taco Bell. I know that it is the Platter’s big black tray that really hypnotizes us: “WHOA! This platter is flippin’ HUUUUUGE, Kip!” After you are done with your meal, you will marvel at the size of this pontoon boat that held your sloppy ploppy mix.

Overall verdict: you’re better off mixing and matching like you normally do at Taco Bell.

(Below, Master Chief wishes he could fight in a sea of hot sauce in the Fiesta PT boat)

taco bell fiesta platter master chief

2. Wendy’s “premium” fish sandwich. I don’t see what’s so premium about it. It’s decent, it filled me up, but it’s kinda blah. The fish itself was good and had a uniform taste–there weren’t any weird chunks in it, and it didn’t taste mashed or processed.

If you’re going to try this fish-thingy, you might add some toppings to it, but I don’t really know what you could add to a fish sandwich that would really make it rock. I’d love to see suggestions for pimping your fish sandwich in the comments.

-MC Spanky McGee

P.S. While you’re here, check out http://soupytrumpet.com/2006/11/15/kfc-for-aliens/