Well, I think the Hawkeye fans are very tired and mildly embarrassed. We fluffed as hard as we could, and the “Giant Chub” (as Bro Taguchi calls it the essence of Hawkeye football spirit) rose into the sky, only to deflate fast when we got busted by Ohio State stroking it to the lingerie section of the Sears Catalog. Of course, we’re only mildly embarrassed because OSU is #1 and they sure as hell played like it (although some Hawks fans didn’t grasp this. Some girls behind my crew and me were whining, “Our defense sucks! Why can’t they stop Antonio Pittman?” We tried, “Because he’s mothafuckin’ Antonio Pittman, and he’s a badass,” but they didn’t understand. I won’t make a gender issue out of this, because I’m sure there were plenty of freshmen males pulling the same shit.) Downtown Iowa City last Saturday was populated by sad souls trying to make it all go away.
Well, Purdue is at Kinnick tomorrow. I imagine that once we lock the door and pull out the vaseline, the Chub will rise. But for tonight, I get the feeling that we’re a little scared to touch it. The Sears Catalog is hidden under the bottom drawer of the desk.
Pumpkin will feel very smug as he reads this. But upsets do happen in college football, and Pumpkin knows this (or chooses to ignore it). I think most Hawkeye fans knew what was on their doorstep, but we were having too much fun with the lingerie section. We kept fluffing.
I can hear the marching band practicing still at 7:03. They’re unzipping the pants right now….